GERMANTOWN, WI [ LINK : FranklinNow/This Just In ]  During my one-week stint as Kevin Fischer’s inflatable auto-pilot, I went out on a limb and guaranteed that the board of the Wisconsin State Testicle* Colleges would deny Germantown’s plea to leave MATC’s plantation.

*Not a typo.  They’ve got some balls, hey.

The prescience demonstrated here was, admittedly, on par with predicting that Obama would beat McCain, or that nobody on the Lions’ roster will be sporting any SuperBowl XLIII jewelry this time next year.  Still, if our creator hadn’t wanted me to pat myself on the back, I wouldn’t have been born with elbows.  So… pat pat pat pat pat.

My elbows make it easy to reach other stuff too.  What do you mean, “Ewww”?  I mean like fixing my hair and picking stuff out of my teeth– ohhhh.  You thought it was some lewd reference… a crude joke alluding to self-stimulation?  Yeah, I knew that’s what you’d think.

See? I really AM psychic…

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