WAUKESHA, WI [ LINK : JSOnline (4th item) ] Too bad Saddam Hussein isn’t around to share the blame. Whoops! I forgot that we’re not ‘posed to type Saddam’s last name until after the November election. My bad. I’ll start over.
A pervert from Illinois (if you’ll pardon that redundancy) was caught trying to take pictures of nekkid women in the dressing room of a department store. He was employed there as the security guard, a position which apparently didn’t compensate “Peeping” Thomas W. Schoen enough that he could afford to pay women to show him their boobage voluntarily, so he and his trusty cell phone had to improvise their own nudie shows in a more covert and frugal manner.
None of that likely comes as a surprise to anybody who has ever been, met, or read about, a man. We men-folk do love the boobage. (An aside: my spellchecker isn’t balking at “boobage”. The program was written by a dude, I guarantee you. Wait, there it goes. It’s suggesting I replace it with “bondage” or “booger”. My spellchecker is sicker than I am. See? It WAS written by a dude.)
Nor should you be shocked to learn that the accused is pleading “somebody else’s fault”. That is, after all, the mantra of our modern feel-good-about-everybody mindset. We don’t have thieves, we have people who suffer from kleptomaniacal tendencies; there are no sexual deviancies, just alternative lifestyles; and I wasn’t a shiftless bum, I was a displaced member of the homeless community, ad infinitum.
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