MILWAUKEE, WI [ JG ] Upon hearing that Milwaukee Mayor Tom Barrett’s administration was stepping in to save Peter Tubic’s house from Milwaukee Mayor Tom Barrett’s administration, I fired off a brief email to Hizonner.  In it, I politely offered to pay Mr. Tubic’s $50.00 fine on his behalf, if the charges were reduced to the original violation.

The first day passed.  I didn’t hear anything.

The second day passed.  I didn’t hear anything.

The third day passed.  I didn’t hear anything.

Today marks the fourth day and… lessee… nope, nothing.

Did I expect that the mayor would drop everything he was doing to immediately respond to me?  No.

What I did expect was that since the Milwaukee Mayor’s Orifice goes to the trouble (and taxpayer expense) of maintaining that ugly-ass website offering Mr. Barrett’s email address (and a picture of the building that he and Laverne & Shirley work near) that somebody down there would, within 72 hours of the receipt of an offer to give them money find the time to hit the reply button and at the very least tap out a polite “No thanks”.

Apparently, as hard as you have to fight to keep your money from City Hall, you have to put equal effort into trying to give money to the city of Milwaukee.  At the very least, an automated response would have sufficed.  For example:

When we put that “Contact the Mayor” link on our ugly-ass website, we hadn’t considered that anybody would be naive enough to believe that clicking on it would do anything.  The hell were you thinking?

Hizonner is too busy trying to take money from people who don’t want to give it up to be bothered with the likes of you, volunteering to just hand money over without any kind of struggle.  Where’s the sport in that?  Pffft.

Kindly stop wasting our time, and warmest regards.

Signed,

The Evil Flying Monkeys of City Hall

   Send article as PDF